Writer's Block: Lost & Found

easy. my beige scarf. i bought it in new york a few months before the big move to hong kong. it was soft and thin and the perfect length, and it magically matched everything i wore. i left it in the hotel the night before i moved. i had some weird obsession with finding it for the next six months. my boyfriend caught me crying one night, i was thinking about new york. he asked me what was wrong and all i could say was "i left my scarf at home". so, he thought i was crazy, but it showed how much emotion and memory i could throw into an item, my beige scarf.



So, just in case you couldn't tell, that was the sound of something BIG approaching.
Prom 2008

I've never actually been to any big dance, and I'm not even the type of person who gets excited over this, but for some reason I've been bringing it up a lot. Most of my friends have been asked already (the boys in our school are extremely creative this year), and I have a date too (the current boyfriend), so I'm feeling like it'll go well. Unfortunately, the prom committee has picked the furthest location from the city where our after party will be, but I'm sure we'll find a way to get back & forth. Really, I can't even worry about the location, I just want the perfect dress!

Ahh, I shouldn't even be allowed to THINK about it now though. I still only have 1/10th of a practice SAT finished and I haven't even finished filling out the necessary forms to take to a meeting with my college counselor. And speaking of counselor, I don't even know if my application to be a summer camp counselor this upcoming summer will be considered! So much stress, so little time...

But back to prom :)
What's the cutest way you've been asked / heard of someone being asked?

xX Em
  • Current Music
    The Arctic Monkeys

I'm Back

Well, I could try to think of an excuse for why I haven't been on LJ for the past seven or so months, but I don't really have one. I wish I could say I've been focusing on school, working hard junior year, but that'd be a complete lie. As a matter of fact my GPA has dropped by 0.45 this year, and second semester is getting worse. But enough, I'm not starting my return off with complaints just yet, whether it's just me reading this or other people...

A lot of stuff has been happening since I last wrote. For starters, I've made a few new friends, not exactly my idea but it happened and that's that. We get so many new kids in our school each year it's inevitable, although after my good friend moved back to the U.S. last year after staying here for about a year I was kind of turned off by the idea of meeting new people, maybe you can understand why. Not surprisingly, two of the three new girls might be moving back to where they came from this summer as well, I don't understand why, but like I said it's something I expected. Whatever, I guess you take what you have in the moment and you just kind of work with it, what else can you do?
And hey Stranger, let me tell you about the boys. I did the whole "falling for the best friend" thing, of course it didn't work out, and yeah, our relationship is kind of damaged now. But you know, the fact that we were best friends is actually reassuring, not worrying. I know that now it's kind of awkward (especially since I'm dating one of his friends), and he doesn't even know how to approach me anymore, but I also know that we have the capability of getting along so well, and eventually it'll come back. Right?

This is still kind of awkward for me, I don't really know how to bounce back into LJ, but I'll work on it, maybe come up with some good stories.
Ah well, I'm off to read what's been going on with everyone else!

xX Em

(no subject)

Lately I've just been all indifferent, it's really bad.

My best friend is moving, and when I said goodbye to her, I didn't cry, I don't even know if I felt sad.
I'm going to see my friends in New York in 2 days, and I'm not even excited.
The boy I liked just told me he had feelings for me, and I'm not even happy.

Not to be all depressed and what not (because I'm not even feeling depressed!) but this kind of sucks. I can't imagine what it's going to be like when the feelings eventually hit me. What if it's too late? She'll already be gone, I might have left New York already, he might have moved on...

I'm going to bed to try to think this out. How can I pressure myself to feel?

And I won't be writing for quite some time, I'll be gone all summer. Take care everyone.



I am DONE with school!
I'm sooo happy ahhh I can't believe it's over.
Tomorrow I get my exams back but that's it, then no more school for another two months. It went by really freakishly fast though... AH! I can't believe I'm a junior next year. Two more years to go until college (maybe I'll look back at this post and sigh at my ignorance).

Today was really good. So I finished my last exam (umm guessed a lot of answers on that one haha), then I went to a coffee shop with my friend and we sat around joking. She's moving back to the US next year, I'm going to miss her a lot even though we've only been friends for about six months. I feel like we share the most in common though, because we've both lived in the states and we just think a lot alike, same humor and everything. So tonight we had a surprise going away party for her at a mexican restaraunt - YUM! It's kind of bitersweet because it hasn't sunk in that after 5 days I won't see her for so long... but we have too much fun together to think about it I suppose.

So HELLO summer, good bye sophomore year, it's been a good one.


9 More Days!

9 more days until I'm back in my old town! Yay! I love the US, I cannot wait.

However, I'm terrified of airplanes. And I'm on a flight with a stop over. So it goes from Hong Kong to California... about 14 hours? Then California to New York... maybe 6 hours? I just might be wrong about these numbers but I do know they are somewhat close to the actual flights. Anyways, point is, I'm really scared. Plus my family doesn't go back to the US with my so I'm always flying alone and put next to random people who don't speak English... and I can never fall asleep on airplanes :[
Any advice?

Also I have my Chemistry final on Monday. I'm soo scared! I studied for like 9 hours today but only got 1 & 1/2 units done... I have 3 & 1/2 more to go. Ohh man. I better go study my butt off!

  • Current Mood
    stressed stressed

Today. I don't blame you if you don't want to read it :]

I can go where no one else can go

I know what no one else knows

Here I am just drownin' in the rain

With a ticket for a runaway train

- - - ♥ - - -

Sorry if the spelling is bad, I'm trying to write this out quickly.

Today was one of the most emotionally exhausting days in a really long time for me. The saddest part was all the frustration, sadness, confusion, and annoyence I have experienced in the past 24 hours wasn't even meant for me.

Actually this all started last night. My friend (we'll call her K) got into some spat with her boyfriend (who will go by the letter W), and was so upset by it that she called me at 9:00 crying hysterically asking for me to come over. So being the type of friend who believes relationships should be based on that 'Ain't No Mountain High Enough' sound, I gathered up my stuff for the next day and took a taxi over. Let's have a moment for self praise... So long story short: K and W got into a fight, W was drunk and accidendtly pushed K, K started screaming about W abusing her, and now they are broken up. My whole day has been me playing messenger to this crazy ex-couple, whether I wanted to or not. I HATE getting involved in this stuff, especially between these two because they are the most stubborn, irrational, selfish people ever... or to each other anyways.

The funny part was this whole fiasco reminded me of my ex, who just so happens to be best friends with W and was at W's house during the fight. I haven't really spoken to him in a few months, but we talked for like 5 second on the phone yesterday. The most ridiculous part was that although my friend had him on speaker as he gave her the worst advice ever, I kind of missed that guy. He may not be very useful in situations like these, but he was trying so hard it was kind of cute. He's graduating this year, so it's not like it's worth it for me to try to build up the relationship again considering I'm leaving in a week, so today's been a little bittersweet for me on top of everthing.

So sorry for my semi-rant.

I'll leave you with one interesting thing today. I have something to add to my not-yet-created List of Things to Do Before I Die...

1. Go Ice Fishing in Canada or Maine (inspired by Discovery Channel). I want to find a neighborhood on a frozen lake, get a house for the ice, and just relax.

And I'm off!


(no subject)

No Lyrics Today.

So yesterday was my best friend's party. It was so much fun, and it didn't rain like we thought it might :] We were on the boat for like seven hours blasting music, jumping off the top part into the water, and tanning (well for me it was more like attempting too - I'm way to impatient to lay there).

The only downside I can think of is I am chubby in a bikini and I definitely got an uneven tan/burn. Ohhh well, I'll live.

Here's a rant... actually another thing that bothered me was this girl on the boat. She's my friend... well, sort of... but she was so awkward! One of the girls kept complaining about her 'nasty body' (she's like a size 0, mind you) but it didn't keep her from running around grinding up against the guys. When lunch came she didn't eat and just sat in the corner, and when the birthday cake came out and my friend made her take a piece she sat there staring at it with the most pissed off look ever! She's not annorexic, but it made all the other girls feel really uncomfortable.
This is probably super hypocritical of me to say considering I am really self concious about my weight, but this is probably one of the reasons why I am!

Okay but other than that yesterday was seriously great. I got to talk to this guy I like (we'll call him P) for a good portion of the time. We made plans to hang out before I leave for the summer, but not like a date or anything. Then after we got home we talked on MSN for like 3 hours, until 1:30 am. Good times :]

Alright, I'm supposed to be studying for finals (my mom let me skip school today as well). It's almost 11:00 am but I can't be bothered to bust open the textbooks and read. I'm wayy too distracted. Guess I better get my butt of LJ.